Toni Tone has sparked a conversation online after revealing that the number of children she has with her husband will depend on how well he performs as both a husband and father.

The British-Nigerian author, content creator and host of the Toni Told Me podcast has built a large following through her conversations around relationships, self-development and dating. She is also the Sunday Times bestselling author of I Wish I Knew This Earlier: Lessons on Love.

Toni married content creator Taiwo Ogebule, also known online as Taye9ja, in Lagos in September 2025, following their engagement the previous year. The pair recently celebrated their first wedding anniversary and currently do not have children.

During a recent appearance on the Ask the Universe podcast, Toni revealed that while her husband would like five children, she has made it clear that expanding their family will be dependent on the experience she has after each child.

“The amount of children you have is going to correspond to your behaviour as a husband and a father,” she said to him.

Rather than committing to a set number beforehand, Toni said she plans to assess things as they go.

“If you have one and you’re father of the year, then I’ll give you a second,” she said, before joking: “I’m gonna cap you when your form starts slipping.”

Her comments quickly divided opinions, with some viewers backing the approach and arguing that a woman’s willingness to have more children can naturally be influenced by how supported she feels by her partner.

One person wrote:

“This is why we have a large amount of mums that are ‘one and done’. So many men fail to step up for their first child, why the hell would we put ourselves through it again.”

Another added:

“I have a belief that majority of postpartum depression cases are due to lack of support, specifically from the other parent.”

However, others argued that regardless of a partner’s involvement, women should ultimately base the number of children they have on what they could personally manage, with one commenter writing:

“Only have the amount of children YOU as a mother can manage.”

The clip has since opened up a wider conversation about marriage, parenthood and how expectations within relationships have changed over the years.

While some viewers saw Toni’s approach as a practical way of ensuring both parents continue to contribute to the family they are creating, others questioned whether love and family planning should be approached so conditionally.

“What happened to the good old days of unconditional love??????” one person asked.

For others, however, Toni’s point highlighted a reality of parenthood: deciding whether to have another child may not simply come down to how many children a couple initially wants, but how supported, secure and capable both partners feel once they actually become parents.

Residents, what do you think? Is Toni’s approach a sensible way to decide how many children to have, or should the decision be made differently? 👀

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